Homebody Moving Away

I always was a homebody. From the time I was born to the time I moved away. I went through this huge journey looking at different colleges all throughout my high school career. At first it was schools around my hometown. It would be schools that I could commute to and from or schools that I would be able to go home every weekend just to see my family. Unlike most teenagers, I had a close connection with my family. I absolutely adored my mom. I had an okay relationship with both of my siblings. My life was good at home.

So, why did I choose to go to a school that was seven hours away from my hometown? I’m glad you asked.

Essentially, in my town there was not many options. My town consisted of farmers, teachers, and random other stuff. Things that I was not interested in. It was a small town. Everyone knew each other and everyone would continue to know each other. What do I mean by that? Basically whoever was born in that town seemed to stay. They didn’t seem to go off and see other parts of the world. They were just stuck there. It was like an endless cycle. Now for some people, being in the cycle is great. It’s unifying and it’s all they have ever known. For me, not so much. I didn’t want to be a part of the cycle any longer. I had to break the cycle while I still could. However, I couldn’t think of a way out.

Was I capable of going to a school miles away from the place I grew up? 

Then one day a former student of our school came to speak about her college experience out of state. It made me realize that if she could do it, I definitely could. With that, I began looking at colleges from surrounding states. This led to some of the best road trips I could ever imagine having with my mom. We visited schools in Virginia, New York, and Tennessee until I finally settled where I am now. After that I was determined on breaking the cycle set forth by many generations before me. I was going to get out and see the world. My mother even encouraged it. She knew I was not destined to live in that town for the rest of my life. She knew way before I did and she told me that. Granted, she is my mother and she is supposed to believe these things. However, she was genuine and meant it. I wasn’t supposed to be there.

What is it like being a homebody in a new town?

It’s honestly kind of hard. Especially because I don’t have the best communication skills. I can’t just go up to some random person and hold a conversation, not for a while anyways. It always turns out really awkward. However, I can say that it has gotten easier. The more I get involved, it seems, the more I am able to communicate and feel a part of something. And it honestly feels great to be a part of something here. On the other hand, I still miss my family. That doesn’t just go away. I’m actually really excited to be going to see them in a few weeks. But I like to think that I’m forming some kind of relationships here that make it easier for when I miss them. It’s almost like starting over.

Now that I’m here, do I want to ever go back to living in my hometown?

Honestly, I don’t think I’ll ever physically live there again. I will definitely visit many times because my family is still there and will most likely always be there. However, as far as me, personally, living there I can’t say that it is my plan. Now that I have seen another portion of the world, I want to see more and more and become more cultured. I also have a dream that cannot be fulfilled there.

Nevertheless, the little town in North Carolina will forever remain my home. Even if I’m a thousand miles away, my heart will always have a place for it. It will be the place I reference back to and say that is the place where I grew, changed, and developed into the person that I am today. That is the place where everything started and that is the place where everything changed.

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